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I have heard from several parents over the years that despite wanting to homeschool their kids, when kindergarten age came around, their kids really wanted to be in school.
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Not so for Horus. He turns five in a week, and when we’re out and about and strangers and acquaintances ask him how his first weeks of school are going, he (somewhat defiantly, I admit) announces “I’m homeschooled”.
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Apart from my philosophical objections to institutionalizing children at a young age (or ever), I also know that Horus does not [yet?] possess even remotely the attitude or constitution or personality that would make public school bearable or survivable for him, his classmates or the poor teacher. Horus is fantastic one-on-one. Group settings are not his forte. There were moments during the past few months that I wanted nothing more than to put Horus on a yellow bus every morning and have him carted away to a brick building for 8 hours so I just don’t have to deal with the kid. A sentiment which in itself is revelatory as to the importance of not ever doing that. There are issues here, both nature and nurture. Horus is extremely passionate, extremely determined, proud, theatrical. And he has parents who come from the far opposite ends of the spectrum of…everything. Geography, even–Lee is 10th generation Carleton County New Brunswick (old school, conservative, reserved, passive, authoritarian–despite his outfits) and I’m from Vancouver (volatile, engaged, opinionated, radical, loquacious). I know, it’s all just stories about who we are. But these stories influence our behaviour, our perceptions, our reactions. Sometimes I do think it would be so much easier and more sensible for these kids if their mother were a door-mat, or at least a dormouse. Lee could be quietly magisterial and dogmatic, the wife would do the dishes and manage everything while saying Yes Dear, and the kids would form a worldview in which children and mothers are seen and not heard. Oops.
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As it is, I can honestly see how things might be confusing–and how the message some days might be something like “FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT TO [insert cause]”. Don’t get me wrong, I adore Lee. And he is not a fundamentally dictatorial person–not at all. But he has incorporated some weird ideas about fatherhood. The core is good: devotion, loyalty, love. But his personal rebellion against his origins was so totally focused on religion that maybe certain aspects were left out of the analysis. Old familial habits die hard.
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Anyway. With three little ones, the logistics of doing any kind of formalized anything is tricky. I have no insecurity or doubt that keeping the kids out of public school is the right thing for us to do right now. Especially on account of the year we’ve had, Horus, Treva and Felix need connection, family, attention. I have talked a little it before about my thoughts on curriculum, unschooling, etc. I don’t really like any of these definitive terms. Do we “unschool”? Well isn’t that what one would call everything that happens in a day? So yes, I suppose we do. We also spend several hours a day reading books together. Felix at 14 months is starting to be able to sit on the sofa and read with us in earnest. Lots of animal sounds, the pointing out of objects in the picture: “ball”, “tree”. I set the scene and I make sure reading is a thrill, a show, a spectacle. My kids will sit and read for however long I can do it. We head to the library at least once a week, usually twice, and I have finally switched my card over to an educators account which is pretty much saving my life (New Brunswick homeschoolers: do this. No late fees.) When we’re reading picture books, every second page or so, Horus will read out loud, which makes for chilled-out, enjoyable practice.
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But in addition to our “unschooling”, I have instituted an hour of one-on-one “homeschool” for both Horus and Treva. Since we’re still living at the church, I have turned a room downstairs into our homeschool room, so from 8-9 am, Horus will come down on his own, and he and I will do our school time. Right now we’re reading a history of the world from Australopithecus to the present day (we’ve reached Sumer and Ancient Egypt right now), and Horus adores everything natural history, especially insects, so that’s a big focus too. We do some drawings at the end, and then Treva comes down. With Treva, I’m working through “Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons”, a book I have used several times, and also with Horus when he was 3. It’s just the best first reading curriculum I’ve come across, and gives phonics fundamentals. Tree loves it, and each lesson only takes about 8 minutes, so after that we also read other books together and then do some drawings. Mostly, our “homeschool” is an opportunity for me to really connect with each kid and to give them my full attention individually. I’m not even remotely considering any formal math or science instruction for another several years–we cover that “unschooling” anyway, while cooking and counting and being in the world. While I’m downstairs with one child, Lee is up with Felix and the other one, where they tidy up after breakfast and get ready for the walk. And when we stay on schedule, the whole day runs pretty smoothly, with Lee’s work-day starting at 10am (which is when the kids and I go for our nature walk).
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In order to make this all work, and to fit in my own work running businesses and faithfully blogging (ha! I’ve been into it lately, yes). I get up at 4 am, which sounds insane and highly ambitious, but just means that I fall asleep by 8pm in the evening. This works out too, because it means that bedtime is very easy. I lie down and cuddle the kids and that’s it. In the past when I tried to stay up late to have some time to myself in the evenings, I would have to *put them to bed*, and lie there, hoping and praying that they would just bloody well fall asleep. This way, they’re happy to know that I’m just there, and I can wake up in the early mornings without any conflict.
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Anyway. I’ve rambled on here. Have a great day everyone.
Cheryl says
Hi! I’m sure you have already considered this, but I thought I would mention it just in case. Only seems fair since I always learn so much from you!
If you are interested, it is not unheard of for students who are homeschooled to attend school for just a subject or two. Typically it’s gym or music, since these are two group activities that typically can’t be experienced the same at home. The gym curriculum is pretty great, and the music curriculum is fun and focuses on singing and choral work. You could even sit in on the odd lesson, or every lesson if you wanted to. And if your home school will not accommodate you, check out another school.
From what I have seen, most schools and teachers are pretty accommodating. I wanted to take a moment to share because it seems like the flexibility and adjustability of the public school system isn’t very well known.
Also, it’s free! You could even check out a class before you brought Horus in to see what you thought. And if the school isn’t interested in working with you, then check out a different school 🙂
School can definitely have it’s disadvantages, but it can also have it’s advantages too…
Cheers!