Horus asked me to cut his hair, and I did so, just minutes after this photograph was taken. After-pics coming up!
(Above: Treva, finishing her pottery for the firing).
Well. I have been meaning to post for a while, and I wanted to write a little bit about Hallowe’en: How much I love it, and its Pagan associations, and how special it was for me as a kid: the mystery and the merry-making and the happy excited energy from my parents who both dressed up and went wild in the most delicious and delightful ways. But the past couple of days have been taken up with preparing for our most recent woodfiring, and also, alas, with a bit of a health scare.
I have never taken my children to see a doctor–ever–and we have been lucky enough not to have experienced any calamity necessitating a visit to the hospital.
But, (and this may come as a surprise to some) I’m not nuts (!), and like all parents, I do my best to keep my kids healthy and safe–despite the inherent risks of being alive.
So when I discovered that a black-legged tick had been feasting on 2 year old Treva for several days (I thought it was a little dreadlock that had developed at the back of her head. It took me a while to get the kids and the scissors in the same room. Yes, I feel guilt about being so slovenly. Especially as I had been checking them for ticks daily during the summer…Anyway) I kind of freaked out.
Then I read everything I could possibly find about Lyme disease. And it turns out, Lyme is quite prevalent in our area. It also turns out that most mainstream doctors don’t know very much about Lyme, and that there is quite a discrepancy between how conventional medicine reads the risk vs. governing bodies, vs. those who suffer from the disease. And, Lyme is often debilitating, painful and very destructive. Scary stuff.
So when I drove Tree and Felix to the hospital emergency in Fredericton at 11pm, and then waited for 6 hours to be seen, only to be told by the shockingly dismissive and arrogant doctor on call that I was being paranoid, and that Lyme disease isn’t even an issue in New Brunswick, and that no one has even been diagnosed with the condition, and that it always presents with a bullseye rash, etc. (along with other pieces of misinformation), I was, understandably I think, frustrated.
But I have to admit feeling a little bit righteous. The only time (the ONLY time!!!) I feel that accessing the Canadian medical system (for which I pay!) is an appropriate course of action, and I am turned away, and essentially denied service. Well, I guess I was right all along. Nothing doing. Not my scene. These are not my people.
Back home, to my spells and potions.
I’m being facetious, of course. I did attempt to argue with the emergency doctor, and even insisted that he prescribe for Treva the antibiotic that is usually suggested as a prophylactic in the case of potential Lyme infection. Doxycycline, however, is contraindicated for children, and while I think the physician was slightly surprised and perhaps taken aback by being confronted with a woman who was clearly informed and intelligent and willing to speak her mind (ahem–I was polite, I promise), and while he DID in the end give me a prescription, he also explained that Doxy can be responsible for damage to a child’s tooth enamel, and can negatively effect their skeletal development and he advised me not to fill the prescription. I suppose, in retrospect, I am appreciative of the fact that he capitulated and allowed me to make the decision, as Treva’s mother, and I suppose that this, in a way, showed a certain level of respect towards me (albeit grudging). And in the end, after reading up (extensively) on the potential side effects of the antibiotic, I decided against it. So…
Back home, to my spells and potions.
To be specific, Cat’s Claw is a herb that many feel has a very potent effect countering Lyme, and possibly preventing it. And of course, I am doing everything I can to boost Treva’s immune system–probiotics, berries, dha, coconut, herbs, the gamut.
But also, and perhaps most importantly, I have decided that she doesn’t have Lyme disease. And here’s the thing: I believe profoundly in the power of the placebo effect, and in the power that we have, as parents, over the way our children see themselves, and the way they vision the future. (And I find it supremely fascinating that the idea of the brain and the mind being separate and different is being studied scientifically by learned individuals who feel that this idea actually has hefty credence…). And I believe strongly that all dis-ease is an expression of psychic and emotional imbalance, and when I sat still for a moment and checked into my True Heart with a focus on my perfect daughter Treva Sweetgrass…everything was clear. This is not to say any of us are safe. Or that I have any special powers. But I think to a great degree, in order to stay sane as mothers and parents of these children whom we love…it is necessary to believe in magic, and to believe in the real magic of positivity and calmness.
So there we are.
Also, it is a good practice to be comfortable with chaos and uncertainty. Parenting is just an ongoing busting of the ego, and of attachment.
And gosh, for me, Hallowe’en is not only wonderful good spooky fun, but also a powerful lesson in non-attachment. Just a couple of hours ago, I had to watch my 4-year old boy being handed a can of cola, and then crack it open and guzzle it in the space of 3 minutes. There goes innocence, washed down with a chaser of C-plus. I wanted so badly to rip it out of his hand, I really did. Nevermind. We had a great night. We connected with so many lovely neighbours–older people who basked in the glow of the little ones’ delight. “What’s this?!?!” Horus and Treva asked. “Well.” I said. “People call that licorice.” They learned lots of names for junk food, and I just smiled and had a good time. Wow. I’ve come a long way. And tomorrow? Back to normal. Just one night of anarchy. I can take it.
wow. so glad your sweet Treva is ok after that tick bite. scary stuff. I work in a ER in the US, so I see some pretty concerned parents with sick kids. I wish more people believed in the power of magick, and the power of positive thoughts. you’re an inspiration. sending love and kind thoughts towards you and your babes. =]
Thank you Ashe. What a lovely message. And what an intense and likely challenging job you have. Take good care, and love & kind thoughts right back to you. Yolande
Yolande, I have a friend in Conneticut (who also believes in healthy living and herbs as you do) who’s young son had Lyme. If you need any information I can put you in touch with her.
I had Lyme myself and I know how scary it can be. Watch for the bulls-eye rash at the bite site and flu-like symptoms.
She’s probably just fine. Not all black-legged ticks carry Lyme. If you saved the tick I would suggest having it tested at a Vet’s. Yes, Vet. The Health Department takes months to get your result to you, if ever, but a vet has the result in days.
Much love to you and your sweet family.
Thank you so much for this message, Maureen. It is much appreciated. For the time being, I am simply watching Treva for any symptoms, and so far, she seems fine. But I know that it can take some time for signs of the disease to appear. And thank you for the positive thoughts! I am hoping very much that our particular tick was not a carrier! Love to you as well. Yolande
Well, I’m sorry you had such a bad doctor experience. That upsets me that when you finally decide to trust a doctor and then they act that way toward you. I do want to tell you that not all doctors are like that. Unfortunately, however, a lot of doctors are very dismissive and sometimes disrespectful. But your kids seem so healthy and strong that I don’t think you really need to even worry about doctors. 🙂
So do you only allow your kids to have sugar on holidays?
And I have a question that’s kind of off topic but do you ever feed your babies anything besides breast-milk? And to what age do you usually nurse your kids? I was just curious because a lot of mothers I know switch between breast-milk and formula and when their babies are bigger they spoon-feed them baby food and such.
But I’m glad you had a happy Halloween. And happy first Halloween to Felix!
Hi there Luci, Thanks for your message, and I’m sorry about the delay in replying to you. And thank you for your good thoughts! So far, Treva is just fine, so I don’t think we need to worry. I loved your questions, and I’m going to be posting more on kids and food soon. We don’t have sugar or refined foods in our house, but we make lots of exceptions: Holidays, other people’s homes, etc. I just wrote a little post on how I feed my babies (here) and I’ll be writing more soon on introducing solid foods to babies. But no, I have never fed my babies anything other than breast-milk, and never formula. I nurse my kids until they are around 20 months, usually. More about that later, also. And a very belated Happy Hallowe’en to you! All the best, Yo
Hello Yolande!
I just wanted to thank you for the fantastic posts in your blog. I so enjoy reading you. You are marvellous and strong! I felt so empowered watching your video and even more reading your blog.
Do you wanna adopt me? 🙂 You have been really inspiring for me.
I am a mother of two girls ( 4 yrs and 11 mo) and maternity has represented a great challenge for me. With my second baby I started seeing everything clearer and to look for empowerment and to grow as a person. Being a mother has been a difficult transition for various reasons, but finally I feel re-born.
So here goes a simple THANK YOU for sharing what you do!
Wishing all to best to you and your lovely family,
Elena
Elena, thank you so much for your messages. I can absolutely relate to what you have said about motherhood–for me, having my first baby was challenging in many ways. I think most of all, emotionally. I was in a challenging relationship, and a challenging headspace. But I think also, that the newness of being a mother can be very hard. For me, everything has become much easier with each baby! I’m so glad to hear that you feel rejuvenated now, as a mother. I wish you and your family the best, also. Warmly, Yolande
Good morning from Australia <3
When I was living in Massachusetts I got Lymes Disease, and I had it for 6 months before I was diagnosed. In my experience, look out for dizzy spells and loss of finemotor(sp?!) skills. I was getting colour spots across my vision and getting very light headed. My mum takes a similar stance to you in regards to using the medical systems of both America and now England as little as she possibly can, but like you when it came to me having Lymes Disease she really didnt mess around. The side effects are quite shockingly strong and scary as it did really start to shut me down slowly. We opted me in for the humongous course of antibiotics as it was quite progressed, 90 days as I remember, and the multitude of blood tests through out to see how i was handling it. It went, but what remained was a battered immune system (not used to antibiotics!), allergies now to penicilin and erythromysin, and cold after cold after cold. We built up my immune system again slowly with the help of a constitutional homeopath and TONS of Yarrow tea (it grows wild and can be dried in the sun, made into tea and drunk with lemon and honey as its quite bitter- Gypsy medicine, and magic indeed. Drink it as you are just getting cold/flu and it nips it in the bud everytime for me). The English medical establishment are also STILL in denial that it is possible to contract Lymes in the UK too, but it is, and talking to people who have recently contracted it, it seems that there is still few SERIOUS options other then taking the antibiotics and then using holistic therapies to heal the body after that.
I hope that helps, and follow your instincts they seem spot on,
Much love,
Bex
My goodness. Thank you so much for sharing this experience, Bex. Very happy to hear that you came through it and are now healthy. And yes, this is one instance in which I would go for antibiotics. Thankfully, so far, Tree has shown no signs of the disease, but I am watching out for all symptoms, and will be for many weeks to come. Very interested in getting my hands on some Yarrow! I, unfortunately, have only a rudimentary knowledge of herbal medicines…as yet! Love to you, Yo
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do internet recearsh on using sea salt for curing Lyme. I had it for seven months before I was diagnosed, and doxycycline only made me sicker. I took a shot of about 1/2 teaspoon of raw sea salt in a small amount of water, and in only hours I felt better than I had in months! I continued this maybe three times a day for several days and it ended my Lyme. I take this shot every now and then just to be sure it stays gone. IT WORKS. DO RESEARCH. TELL THE PEOPLE!!
Very interesting, Bardhyl. Thanks very much for your message. I did opt against using doxycycline, and from what I have heard from others, and now, from you, I’m glad we decided not to go that route. So far, thankfully, Treva is doing just fine, with no sign of any health problems. Take good care.
Greetings dear sister 🙂 What a blessing to have you share your families birthing video of Felix and this wonderful site. I am so happy to see and read women picking up and carrying the torch of goddess creator, manifester, energy worker. Its a fierce loving energy that spreads through our collective network, and I feel it spreading. I myself am 7 months pregnant with my first and feel blessed to be here in the now with all of you. I would like to ask if you or your partner have any suggestions for my S.O and I regarding our desire to home birth. For me it is a must, a clear vision, a right and from a political perspective a duty to the way of the good. My S.O is totally on board but I sense fear in him and when we talk about our options he often brings up the fact that if/when I go into labor and he doesn’t know what to do he will take me to the hospital. I read what you wrote about the projection of men as fainting in the delivery room etc and I feel he is filling those shoes in his minds eye. Naturally my reaction is, “well then, I will do it alone” but I don’t want to exclude him and hope to empower him to see the utter importance of this on every scale. Alright well again thank you for putting your energy out on this platform, it is well received and reverberated.
Blessings to you and your wonderful family,
Stena (25, Washington)
Hello Stena, apologies for the late reply. I have been thinking so much about your comment, and I have lots to say! I think I will say it in an upcoming blog post, actually. I’m aiming for tomorrow, so check back tomorrow or Friday. But in the meantime, thank you so much for writing, and HUGE congratulations on the upcoming arrival of your little one. Such an exciting time. Much love!